how i feel

When I was a kid it would make sad to see all the kids running, and riding bikes outside. Now, as I see my friends growing up, driving, going to college, moving away, getting married and having kids I feel like they're leaving me behind. Sometimes I feel like what guy would want to date me, marry me, be with me.

As my dexterity and tremors are getting worse,I'm noticing I can't or I'm having trouble doing things I could do like 5 years ago. Things like using a spoon or fork, using the TV remote, using a cell phone, taking wrappers off foods, writting, or typing, I can't even pick up a M&M or a pill.

I have trouble feeding myself sometimes and my mom has to help and that makes me feel like a baby.I'm kind of afraid to play with my dog, he starts growling when I start to wrap my arm around his belly cause he dosen't know what's going on because of my tremors and lack of muscle control.

Sometimes I feel like an 80 year old lady complaining my back, my neck, and my hips hurt.